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Archive for April, 2010

Coming Home is Hard

You feel that … you’re only just holding your own, or possibly losing ground.

The Art of Coming Home by Craig Storti, page 72

In context, this quote is talking about being a professional on your way home to a job where it is difficult to readjust to the difference in being back in your original company. I am not doing that, but I have returned to my university after being in England for 4 wonderful months. And in some sense, this sentence summed up how I’ve felt for the last couple months. I’m begining to not feel that way anymore, but it’s a slow process.

Trying to catch up with how my friends lives had changed while I was gone as well as applying for graduation, graduate school, and considering going back to England for my graduate classes was (and is) a bit daunting. The most difficult is in reconnecting with people. I used to know people’s names and how or why I knew them, but now that I’m back from Bristol, I’ll see people who I recognize but have no idea what their name is or how I know them. And it’s not just the people that I had a tenuous acquaintance with who I’ve forgotten, but my friend’s friends who I’ve meet but don’t remember any more.

Another experience that I didn’t expect at all is in my language. I actually felt like I was losing ground in knowing what language I spoke. Should I use the British English I’d learned or revert to American English? Should I be worried when I forget the British English I worked so hard to learn? Some days I felt like I was going a bit mad.

Now that I’ve had a few months to re-adjust to life in Ohio and think about what made my readjustment so hard. I think one of the biggest difficulties I’ve faced is my mindset. In England I was excited to get involved and be intentional about what I did with my time. I’ve lost a bit of that coming back to Ohio, but maybe not as much as I sometimes think. I think God’s used my time as an international student to give me a desire to be more plugged in to what is happening around me, rather than merely floating along life passively. I want to share the gospel like I was able to in England and God’s given me different opportunities than I would have done in England, but His Work is still happening. It’s a good reminder to see that I’m in God’s family, no mater where I am or even if I feel like I’m losing ground.

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